I Do My Job: For the Mellie Grant’s of the World
So, ABC’s Scandal has quickly become one of my FAVORITE shows on television. I don’t know what it was about my move, but I have clearly become a TV person, where I definitely wasn’t one before. And literally from the moment I started watching Scandal, I was totally hooked. Strong BLACK female lead, which just happens to be played by my BOOTHANG Kerry Washington, as well as mysterious and tight knit supporting characters who navigate the ins and outs of the city that I essentially live right outside of? Not to mention, Columbus Short. Hi Columbus Short. Anyway, this show has THE SHIT stamped across its forehead. I cannot get enough of it, and I find myself even checking it out online to re-watch and relive its most awesome moments.
Last night was the season 1 finale, and though I am so upset to let it go, while they record the second season, I am so happy with how the season ended, as well as looking forward to everything that the next season has in store. On last night’s episodes, the character that I most closely relate to, Mellie, who plays the FLOTUS, said something extremely profound to Olivia, her husband’s long time mistress during their confrontation at the crux of a White House crisis. It was outstanding and upsetting, pivotal and illogical, but it was a writing masterpiece. If you have ever been in a relationship that failed based on the error of someone else, who you thought was on your team, on your side, and working toward the same set of goals as you, and been baffled, literally rocked by the situation, it was so powerful:
Mellie: “I do my job. I smile, and I push him and I make sure he has what he needs. I DO my job. Why couldn’t YOU do yours?”
Olivia: Blank Kerry Washington about to cry/shocked face.
Mellie: “You wanna deal? Fine. Let’s deal. For starters, I’m gonna need to take my husband back. Because clearly, I have to do everything MYSELF from now on.”
Freaking WHOA! I have a thing for popular guys. In some arena or another, the men I have dated have been socially on a higher tier than others. I like attention, so any man I enjoy has to be able to not only shower me with it, but garner a fair amount of it too. I cannot tell you how many times this has burned me though, because with attention comes negativity. Whether it be in the form of other women, people who don’t think you measure up to the man you’re with, or just generally people who would like to see you fail, being with a man who has some status, a fairly large circle socially, or via his employment has pitfalls. I am clearly nowhere near the FLOTUS, but, I get playing a role in order to be with the kind of man you want. You do the work you have to do, and often overlook some things that other women wouldn’t think to, or dare to, in order to have the type of lifestyle you want. It really knocks the wind out of you when you do all this work, keep up all the appearances, and someone gets out of hand and lets something poor happen, or something slimy slip through the cracks.
I won’t tell personal stories about my current, or past relationships on this blog, because I do like to keep SOME things to myself, but there is no greater pain than working hard for something and someone you love, not just because you love them, but because there is a greater good at stake…and having the person or people you work with not do the same work. When your partner, or teammate is not taking the same precaution, or doing the same level of work you are, it not only stings, it lets you know that what you are collectively working for is now and always going to be more important to YOU than it is to them. And in that moment, you KNOW for certain, you have to carry more weight on your shoulders and do much more yourself, because they won’t ever be able to.
Not to mention, once you realize you don’t have equal stake and investment in what you were collectively working for, it’s usually because there is some giant shit stain on whatever it was now. And the stain is there forever. Say you and your three best friends wanted to build a home together. You all are laying the foundation, and you were all shown the technique by a master craftsman. He explained clearly that you had to make sure there would be no cracks in the foundation. If there were any, you’d risk flooding & termites later. You don’t ever know who slacked, who didn’t care as much about the foundation, until you have flooding and your kitchen cabinets cave in because of termite infestation. In order to find out the effort wasn’t there, something DETRIMENTAL had to fall apart. And why does the cabinet always seem to cave in during a dinner party? Everyone’s watching.
The best thing about the interaction was that even though things were caving in around the First Lady, and she had considered walking away from it all, she didn’t. When you’ve worked so hard for something that was golden and turns to brass in the blink of an eye, in moments of weakness, we all want to chuck the deuces and say peace out. I know plenty of maybe smarter women who do. Sometimes I’ve even been that smarter woman and just left my masterpiece behind. Eventually though, I think we all have our one disaster, one situation that can either be the coup de grâce that does us in, or the moment that we realize I am not leaving this mess…I am cleaning it up, and I am going to just have to do the work I want done now MYSELF. When Mellie told Olivia she was going to need her husband back, I was totally floored. Both my socks and my face had blown off, and I had to collect them. Shonda Rhimes is my own personal writer-goddess today, for bringing to light a character that is not only totally real, but incredibly admirable to me.
I loved that portion of the episode last night. I took it with me, and will hold onto how extremely real it was for me. Especially since it just reminds me of how well I did my job. For all of you women out there who’ve done your job, and beyond, I hope you take it with you too.Tags: Do, Fitzgerald Grant, I, I Do My Job, Job, Mellie Grant, Mistress, My, Olivia Pope, Scandal, Shonda Rhimes